{"id":2500,"date":"2025-03-22T21:25:06","date_gmt":"2025-03-22T21:25:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/?p=2500"},"modified":"2025-03-23T00:15:01","modified_gmt":"2025-03-23T00:15:01","slug":"what-you-resist-persists","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/?p=2500","title":{"rendered":"What you resist persists&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"2500\" class=\"elementor elementor-2500\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-440de0ef elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"440de0ef\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-72c7128\" data-id=\"72c7128\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-47d4fe04 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"47d4fe04\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.12.2 - 23-04-2023 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#69727d;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#69727d;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"\" data-start=\"506\" data-end=\"595\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-2504 size-full\" src=\"http:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/rain-drops-the-rain-leaf-wet-nature-the-background-rain-rain-rain-rain-rain-5336161.jpg\" alt=\"rain, drops, the rain, leaf, wet, nature, the background, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain-5336161.jpg\" width=\"1280\" height=\"853\" srcset=\"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/rain-drops-the-rain-leaf-wet-nature-the-background-rain-rain-rain-rain-rain-5336161.jpg 1280w, https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/rain-drops-the-rain-leaf-wet-nature-the-background-rain-rain-rain-rain-rain-5336161-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/rain-drops-the-rain-leaf-wet-nature-the-background-rain-rain-rain-rain-rain-5336161-1024x682.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/rain-drops-the-rain-leaf-wet-nature-the-background-rain-rain-rain-rain-rain-5336161-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1280px) 100vw, 1280px\" \/>\u00a0<\/h3>\n<h3 class=\"\" data-start=\"506\" data-end=\"595\"><em style=\"font-size: 1.666667rem;\" data-start=\"512\" data-end=\"595\">Feel the Feelings: A Letter to fellow Widows walking through grief and motherhood<\/em><\/h3>\n<div><em data-start=\"512\" data-end=\"595\">\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em data-start=\"512\" data-end=\"595\">\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"597\" data-end=\"650\">I\u2019m not going to lie\u2014this journey hasn\u2019t been easy.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"652\" data-end=\"885\">Becoming a mum is already one of the most overwhelming, all-consuming experiences life can offer. You\u2019re suddenly 100% responsible for a tiny, precious human being. And when you\u2019re doing it <strong data-start=\"842\" data-end=\"850\">solo<\/strong>, that weight feels even heavier.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"887\" data-end=\"1034\">But honestly? The emotional impact of solo parenting while grieving can be far more intense than the sleepless nights or the physical exhaustion.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1036\" data-end=\"1191\">It\u2019s the milestones that hurt the most.<br data-start=\"1075\" data-end=\"1078\" \/>The <strong data-start=\"1082\" data-end=\"1101\">first Christmas<\/strong>.<br data-start=\"1102\" data-end=\"1105\" \/>The <strong data-start=\"1109\" data-end=\"1127\">first birthday<\/strong>.<br data-start=\"1128\" data-end=\"1131\" \/>The <strong data-start=\"1135\" data-end=\"1158\">first day of school<\/strong>.<br data-start=\"1159\" data-end=\"1162\" \/>All of them\u2026 <em data-start=\"1175\" data-end=\"1188\">bittersweet<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1193\" data-end=\"1257\">Always a smile\u2026 followed by silent tears when no one\u2019s watching.<\/p>\n<hr class=\"\" data-start=\"1259\" data-end=\"1262\" \/>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1264\" data-end=\"1298\">Grief doesn&#8217;t follow a timeline.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1300\" data-end=\"1523\">Some days, my mind races a hundred miles an hour, full of thoughts like:<br data-start=\"1372\" data-end=\"1375\" \/><em data-start=\"1375\" data-end=\"1414\">\u201cShouldn\u2019t I be doing better by now?\u201d<\/em><br data-start=\"1414\" data-end=\"1417\" \/><em data-start=\"1417\" data-end=\"1458\">\u201cDo people expect me to have moved on?\u201d<\/em><br data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1461\" \/><em data-start=\"1461\" data-end=\"1521\">\u201cAm I worrying everyone by being honest about how I feel?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1525\" data-end=\"1670\">Most days, I put on a brave face\u2014because that\u2019s what we do, isn\u2019t it?<br data-start=\"1594\" data-end=\"1597\" \/>We survive.<br data-start=\"1608\" data-end=\"1611\" \/>We carry on.<br data-start=\"1623\" data-end=\"1626\" \/>Even when we\u2019re completely drained inside.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1672\" data-end=\"1882\">But here\u2019s something I\u2019ve learned after almost six years as a widow:<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1672\" data-end=\"1882\"><strong data-start=\"1746\" data-end=\"1808\">You can\u2019t heal if you\u2019re constantly pretending to be okay. <br \/><\/strong>Letting yourself <strong data-start=\"1828\" data-end=\"1850\">feel what you feel<\/strong> is not weakness\u2014it\u2019s necessary.<\/p>\n<hr class=\"\" data-start=\"1884\" data-end=\"1887\" \/>\n<h3 class=\"\" data-start=\"1889\" data-end=\"1918\">\ud83c\udf3f What\u2019s Helped Me Cope:<\/h3>\n<h4 class=\"\" data-start=\"1920\" data-end=\"1958\">1. <strong data-start=\"1928\" data-end=\"1958\">Allowing the hard feelings<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"1959\" data-end=\"2162\">I\u2019ve learned that emotions come in waves\u2014grief, anger, joy, confusion\u2014and I don\u2019t try to fight them anymore. I let them pass <em data-start=\"2084\" data-end=\"2093\">through<\/em> me instead of bottling them up.<br data-start=\"2125\" data-end=\"2128\" \/>Because what you resist\u2026 persists.<\/p>\n<h4 class=\"\" data-start=\"2164\" data-end=\"2205\">2. <strong data-start=\"2172\" data-end=\"2205\">Prioritising my mental health<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"2206\" data-end=\"2369\">Whether it&#8217;s journaling, talking to a friend, a walk in nature, or just turning off my phone for the night, I\u2019ve learned to listen to what my body and mind need\u2014without guilt.<\/p>\n<h4 class=\"\" data-start=\"2371\" data-end=\"2401\">3. <strong data-start=\"2379\" data-end=\"2401\">Learning to say No<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"2402\" data-end=\"2551\">If I don\u2019t feel up to something\u2014social events, extra work, even well-meaning conversations\u2014I give myself permission to <em data-start=\"2521\" data-end=\"2530\">opt out<\/em>. My peace is sacred.<\/p>\n<h4 class=\"\" data-start=\"2553\" data-end=\"2596\">4. <strong data-start=\"2561\" data-end=\"2596\">Focusing on what really matters<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"2597\" data-end=\"2827\">At the end of the day, it\u2019s the <strong data-start=\"2629\" data-end=\"2645\">quality time<\/strong> with my daughter that means everything. When I take care of myself, I show up for her better. And that\u2019s the version of me she deserves.<br data-start=\"2782\" data-end=\"2785\" \/><em data-start=\"2785\" data-end=\"2827\">That\u2019s the version of me I deserve, too.<\/em><\/p>\n<hr class=\"\" data-start=\"2829\" data-end=\"2832\" \/>\n<h3 class=\"\" data-start=\"4013\" data-end=\"4054\">\ud83d\udc9b A Note to you, If you\u2019re grieving:<\/h3>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"4056\" data-end=\"4222\">If you\u2019re here because you\u2019ve lost someone\u2014and you\u2019re trying to carry on while raising a child, healing a heart, or simply making it through the day\u2014please know this:<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"4224\" data-end=\"4334\">You are not alone.<br data-start=\"4242\" data-end=\"4245\" \/>You are not doing it wrong.<br data-start=\"4272\" data-end=\"4275\" \/>And you <strong data-start=\"4283\" data-end=\"4334\">absolutely do not need to have it all together.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"4336\" data-end=\"4535\">Grief is messy, unpredictable, and deeply personal.<br data-start=\"4387\" data-end=\"4390\" \/>But in time\u2014at your own pace\u2014you will find your way back to light.<br data-start=\"4456\" data-end=\"4459\" \/>Maybe not the life you expected. But still, one with meaning, joy, and love.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"4537\" data-end=\"4663\">You deserve a life where you feel <em data-start=\"4571\" data-end=\"4580\">present<\/em>, not just surviving.<br data-start=\"4601\" data-end=\"4604\" \/>Your children deserve <em data-start=\"4626\" data-end=\"4631\">you<\/em>, as whole and human as you are.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" data-start=\"4665\" data-end=\"4737\">.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 Feel the Feelings: A Letter to fellow Widows walking through grief and motherhood \u00a0 \u00a0 I\u2019m not going to lie\u2014this journey hasn\u2019t been easy. Becoming a mum is already one of the most overwhelming, all-consuming experiences life can offer. You\u2019re suddenly 100% responsible for a tiny, precious human being. And when you\u2019re doing it &hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more\"> <a class=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/?p=2500\"> <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">What you resist persists&#8230;<\/span> Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_mi_skip_tracking":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","wds_primary_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2500","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-love-and-loss"],"aioseo_notices":[],"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":false,"thumbnail":false,"medium":false,"medium_large":false,"large":false,"1536x1536":false,"2048x2048":false},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"jaquie.pantoja@gmail.com","author_link":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/?author=1"},"uagb_comment_info":2,"uagb_excerpt":"\u00a0 Feel the Feelings: A Letter to fellow Widows walking through grief and motherhood \u00a0 \u00a0 I\u2019m not going to lie\u2014this journey hasn\u2019t been easy. Becoming a mum is already one of the most overwhelming, all-consuming experiences life can offer. You\u2019re suddenly 100% responsible for a tiny, precious human being. And when you\u2019re doing it&hellip;","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2500"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2507,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500\/revisions\/2507"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2500"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2500"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crazybeautifulmadness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2500"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}